Modern Zelda: Smart Phone of Time part 8

(Talon is sleeping near some milk crates)
(The cucco crows loudly)
Talon: What in the name of tarnation? Can’t a parson git a little shut-eye ‘round here? Uh, who are you?
Link: I’m---
Talon: Yup, I’m Talon, the owner of Lon Lon Ranch. I went to this here castle to deliver some milk, but I must’a fallen asleep! WHAT?! Malon was lookin’ fer me? I messed up real bad, leavin’ Malon behind to wait fer me! She’s really gonna kick my--- (running away) AHHHHHHHHH!
(Link positions the milk crates so that he can get through a small hole, eventually reaching the Castle Courtyard, where Zelda is looking through a window)
Link: Hey, girl. Wanna go and---
Zelda: (gasps) Who are you? How did you get past the guards?
Link: The guards? Oh, that was so easy! You wanna go out for a cup of---
Navi: Hey! HEY!!! Listen, Link! You gotta concentrate! C’MON! We gotta find---
Zelda: Is that... a fairy? Then, are you... are you... (getting excited and hyper) Are you from the forest?!
Link: Yeah, I’m a---
Zelda: Do you have... The spiritual stone of the forest? That green and shining stone?
Link: Yep! I got it from---
Zelda: I knew it! I had this dream... In the dream, dark clouds were billowing---
Link: What’s that mean?
Zelda: NO INTERRUPTING!!! Anyway, they were forming over the land of Hyrule! Isn’t that soooooo creepy? (Link nods) Suddenly, a ray of light shot out of the forest and lit up the ground! (Link is distracted) PAY ATTENTION!!! This is the best part!!! The light turned into a figure holding a shiny green stone and a fairy was screaming at it.
Link: (sarcastically) Wow! That’s so cool!
Zelda: I know, right? I knew it was a prophecy---
Link: How?
Zelda: I just did, OK?
Navi: Hey! Listen! NOW!!! We have to find that princess girl or Hyrule will---
Zelda: Oh, silly me. I forgot to introduce myself! I’m Zelda, princess of Hyrule. What’s you name?
Link: I’m Link, um... dude from the forest... and all that crap.
Zelda: Hmmmm... That sounds strangely familiar... somehow.
Link: That’s creepy. I think I’ll go and---
Zelda: OK, Link. I’m gonna tell you the story of the Sacred Realm that’s been passed that’s been passed down by the Royal Family of Hyrule! Please keep this a secret from everyone...
Link: Um, no.
Zelda: Don’t be a blabber-mouth! You’d better keep this a secret from everybody... OR ELSE!!!
Link: Fine.
Zelda: The legend goes like this... The three goddesses hid the Triforce containing the power of the gods somewhere in Hyrule. Whoever gets the Triforce gets one wish granted. If someone with a good heart makes a wish, it will lead Hyrule to a golden age of prosperity... But if someone with an evil mind makes a wish, the world will be consumed with evil! So the ancient Sages built the Temple of Time to protect the Triforce from evil people! That’s right... The Temple of Time is the gateway from our world to the Sacred Realm. But the entrance is sealed with a stone wall called the Door of Time...
Link: If it’s a wall, why is it called the Door of Time?
Zelda: DOES IT MATTER?! Anyway, in order to get passed the wall, you have to have the three Spiritual Stones. You also need the treasure of the Royal Family of Hyrule, which is kept along with this legend... The Smart Phone of Time!
Link: OK, I guess that makes---
Zelda: Oh, yeah. I was spying through the window just now. The other part of my dream... the dark clouds... I bet they symbolize... THAT MAN! Look!
(Ganondorf is kneeling on the ground)
Zelda: Do you see the man with the evil eyes? That’s Ganondorf, the leader of the Gerudos. They’re from the desert far to the west. Even though he swears allegiance to my dad, I’m sure he doesn’t mean it. The dark clouds in my dream... They must symbolize that man!
Link: (to Navi) I think she’s just racist...
Zelda: What?
Link: Nothing!
(Ganondorf notices Link, who backs up)
Zelda: What happened? Did he see you?
Link: Yeah, he---
Zelda: Don’t worry. He doesn’t have any idea what we’re planning... yet.
Link: Um... I don’t really---
Zelda: I told my dad about my dream, and he did not believe it was a prophecy.
Link: I kinda agree with---
Zelda: But I can sense that man’s evil intentions! Ganondorf must be after nothing more than the Triforce of the Sacred Realm. He must have come to Hyrule to get it!
Link: Lemme guess... He want to conquer Hyrule---
Zelda: No, the entire world!
Link: (muttering) This girl’s crazy. (to Zelda) Why would---
Zelda: Because he’s EVIL!!! Link... We’re the only ones who can protect Hyrule!
Link: I’m sorry... I don’t believe any of---
Zelda: PLEASE! My prophecies have never been wrong! I HAVE POWERS, LINK!!!
Link: OK, OK, OK!
Zelda: Thank you! I have a feeling that man is going to destroy Hyrule! He has such terrifying power! But it's fortunate that you have come... We must not let Ganondorf get the Triforce! I will protect the Smart Phone of Time with my life! You go find the other two spiritual stones! Let’s get the Triforce before Ganondorf does, and then defeat him!
Link: (backing away) I’ll just go do that and---
Zelda: Take this letter! I’m sure it’ll be helpful to you!
Navi: Hey. HEY!!! You just got Zelda’s letter! Cool! It has her autograph!
Zelda: My attendant will take you out of the castle. Go talk to her!!!
(Link heads toward the exit, but Impa blocks his path)
Impa: I’m Impa of the Sheikahs. I’m Zelda’s nanny, so to speak. She’s right, you know.
Link: (trying not to laugh) Sure.
Impa: You’re going on a big adventure, huh? Zelda has instructed me to let you download an app. Only royal family members are allowed to have it, but this is an exception. Here’s the code to download it... Z L U L B Y.
Navi: You downloaded “Zelda’s Sleepy App”! GOT IT?!
Impa: I’ll take you out of the castle.